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What You Can Do When You Feel Like You’re Failing As A Mom

So there’s a joke going around the internet lately, have you seen it?

That’s right friends. It has been a year since we all thought we’d be buckling down at home for a couple of weeks. 

Flash forward a year later, and for many of us, our kids still haven’t returned back to school entirely, many of us are working from home still, and some are starting their second round of holidays, birthdays, and celebrations  during the pandemic. 

This has all brought about one huge glaring issue in our American society… many of us moms are simply not okay. We feel like we are absolutely failing many days.

In a recent piece by The New York Times entitled “The Primal Scream” they discuss how “America’s mothers are in crisis”. 

And I have to say- I agree.

I know that we aren’t all experiencing the exact same set of circumstances, but there is one thing that does seem to be happening to so many of us moms. We’re being asked to do it all- without the supports that are typically available and with added responsibilities. 

I’ll be honest, I’ve gone into my laundry room or car to cry once or twice and talk myself up, telling myself that I can make it through the rest of the day. And I know that I’m not alone. I hope you now know that you aren’t either.

Women are expected to do it all, and why? Simply because we are the moms? 

Nope. Not okay.

But all hope is not lost. There are things that we can do to take steps towards making things better for those of us who are feeling overwhelmed and like we are failing at being mom (even though we aren’t actually failing).

Here are some things we can do:


This one can be scary when you are already feeling overwhelmed and not good enough, but it’s the first step in making our situation better. 

Open up and share your feelings with others and talk about what’s going on and what you think you need.

You can talk to your spouse, parenting partner, close friends, or your family. 

It’ll be okay.

READ: How to Have an Awesome Conversation with Kids

Ask for help

From your spouse/parenting partner and our kids. 

You do not have to do everything for everyone in the family. And if you never ask for help, no one will ever know that you could have used some help.

In times like these, we all need to support one another, and sometimes we can help our family best by asking for help so we can make it through the day as well.

READ: How to Calm Down When Stressed

Don’t be so hard on yourself

You don’t have to do everything to the standards you held for yourself “back in the day”. Give yourself a break. These are unprecedented times.

Give your kids some screen time.

Order out or make a frozen meal.

Let the laundry sit unfolded or not put away.

It’s okay to let some things go so that you can save your sanity.

READ: For you, exhausted mama, who needs help with self-care

Know that you aren’t alone

I know I’ve said this once, but this one I want to make sure that you know…

You Are NOT Alone.

So many of us are struggling right now. And it’s going to be okay. 

Resources We Shared:

America’s Mothers Are in Crisis (from The New York Times)

Primal Scream Line (The New York Times)

Mama, You Don’t Need to Do It All Podcast (Episode #11)

Find Your Passion with Pamela Pekerman (Episode #40)

Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most

Positive Discipline: The Classic Guide to Helping Children Develop Self-Discipline, Responsibility, Cooperation, and Problem-Solving Skills

Drama-Free Homework Checklist

Download the transcripts HERE

The best mom is a happy mom. To better take care of you, download our No Guilt Mom mindset here .  These reminders will help you second guess less, and feel more confidence every day in your parenting.

Brie Tucker

COO/ Podcast Producer at No Guilt Mom
Brie Tucker has over 20 years of experience coaching parents with a background in early childhood and special needs. She holds a B.S. in Psychology from the University of Central Missouri and is certified in Positive Discipline as well as a Happiest Baby Educator.

She’s a divorced mom to two teenagers.

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