Podcast Episode 271: Let Them Eat Sugar: Busting the Mom Myths that Simply Aren’t True Transcripts

JoAnn Crohn: parents who believe a child’s behavior is affected by sugar are more likely to perceive their children as hyperactive when they’ve been led to believe the child has just had sugar. so. It’s an interesting thing. It’s all about expectations and how we expect our kids to behave.

Welcome to the no guilt mom podcast. I am your host JoAnn Crohn joined here by the lovely Brie Tucker.

Brie Tucker: Why? Hello. Hello, everybody. How are you?

JoAnn Crohn: We are live again in our podcast, Facebook group. So if you have not joined that yet, come on over, join us there. We put a link for you right in the show notes. It’s a cool way to be involved in the show. We take people’s comments and we work it into the episodes. So if you have like a specific question during an episode, you’d like pop it right there in the chat and we make an episode just for you.

And today, we are getting into myths and I love myth busting. I find it to be like the funnest thing when I’ve thought something for so long. And then the research proves that, Hey, actually, this isn’t true. Like it brings me a lot of joy, Brie.

Brie Tucker: I can see that. I can see that. Like, I’m like, I’m like, I don’t know. It depends on if I’m really passionate about it. And like I said, like we’ve got, so we picked three myths today and we each have one of those three that we’re very passionate about that. We’re like, ah, Can’t wait to bust. So yeah, I mean, I guess so. Yeah, I like, I have a lot of, uh, like when it’s something new that I thought was something different.

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah.

Brie Tucker: maybe being a home visitor and having done that for so long, like I get us also a little nervous if there’s something that I was like told was the case and then it isn’t anymore and I’m like, Oh crap. I told people wrong information. So

JoAnn Crohn: I mean, I think that happens throughout our whole lives. Like we do what we do until we know better. It happened to me in teaching. Like I did things during, when I was a teacher that I thought was best practice that now it’s like, is not like rewards and punishments for one. I had kids go clip down in the back of the classroom.

Cause I thought it created accountability. And now I’m like, Oh my gosh, why did I do that? Like poor children who had to go do that? I can’t believe that. So I think that, you know, The more you learn, the more you change your behavior. It’s all about growth.

Brie Tucker: I’ve seen that little like NBC thing from like the 80s. The more you know, little star just shooting across this. The more you know.

JoAnn Crohn: so here’s the myths you have to look forward to today. Number one, sugar makes kids hyper total myth. We’re going to debunk for you. Number two is. If kids are hyper, they’re not ready to go to sleep yet. Other myth. And number three is Brie’s personal favorite.

Brie Tucker: if your kid isn’t hyper. Then they definitely don’t have ADHD.

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah. So we can’t wait to get started and let’s get on with the show. Okay, Brie, let’s get in to these myths, starting with number one, because I get so like up in arms with all of the claims about foods causing these behaviors and kids. I get so mad when people are like, yes, research shows that you shouldn’t eat these things or research shows that like, these are bad for your gut or research shows that these dyes should be fed because they cause ADHD and I’m like, Hold the phone.

a lot of these claims are being made based on like one singular study that was done one time. And many of them have actually been debunked or, not been able to be proven in subsequent things. So it’s like whenever foods involved, I’m like, hold up what you’re saying to somebody. And. A lot of that’s my personal experience.

I mean, I’m pretty open with the fact that I had an eating disorder. I’m still very like prime for an eating disorder and disordered eating in my life. and I figuring out what foods to eat is such a source of stress for people. It’s such a source of stress. And when you’re constantly worried about something, having a ingredient in it, that’s going to be bad for you, it gets it really hard to find foods that you actually like first enjoy second, that couldn’t provide you with like all the nutritional stuff that you need and, just eliminate the stress around eating.

So this is why I get so passionate about it. And this myth that sugar causes kids to be hyper. Is. Everywhere I heard it as a teacher, I hear it from other parents. My sister actually just said it, the other night when her son was bouncing around the room and she’s like, Oh, I shouldn’t have given you those ice pops.

And I turned to her and I’m like, did you actually know that sugar doesn’t cause kids to be hyper? And she’s like, no. And she’s in the medical profession too. And so this is pervasive there as well. so let’s break it down. Let’s

Brie Tucker: you was going to say you did a lot of like, so just real quick, like we normally do an outline for an episode in the research can be all over the place as to how much in detail we go. But in this one, JoAnn did the first myth and I did the next to JoAnn’s one myth of research is two pages long. My two myths are one page long with the research. So. We have a lot to back up the sugar one. So let’s get started on this. Where did this come from? Because we all have heard it.

JoAnn Crohn: We’ve all heard it. So this came from allergist, Benjamin Feingold in 1975. He published something called the fine gold diet, and this diet advocated a diet free of solicits solicit. I’m so sorry if I butcher that word for everybody. Salicylate.

Brie Tucker: case you were thinking we were.

JoAnn Crohn: I would say like scientists is not it, but salicylates, let’s call it salicylates. That sounds like it should be it. Salicylates,

Brie Tucker: to me. That works.

JoAnn Crohn: As Brie and JoAnn, who’s it’s like you have one job on a podcast talk. We’re like butchering the words.

Brie Tucker: Hey, no, but at no point

is this talking include correctly articulating or pronouncing words that we do not see in our day to day lives. So. I say it’s okay.

JoAnn Crohn: This new book I’m reading actually had a word in it I had never seen. It is spelled I N C H O A T E and it’s, uh, now I’m going to butcher the pronunciation. Inquit. Inquit. It’s called Inquit. It means like, just beginning to form. Inquit.

Brie Tucker: That sounds like a New York Times crossword

JoAnn Crohn: Exactly. And I showed it to my husband and he’s like, Oh, that word. I’ve always pronounced it in show it or something, but it’s in Kuwait, in

Brie Tucker: never seen that word, nor heard that word

JoAnn Crohn: Now you’re going to see it everywhere. Anyways, getting back to this, getting, getting back to the salicylates, this allergist, Benjamin Feingold, he advocated a diet free of salicylates, food colorings, and artificial flavoring for treating hyperactivity.

So all of those things. Things that you hear right now about ADHD and diet actually go back to the seventies with this one guy, he didn’t call for eliminating sugar specifically, but he did suggest to like a many parents that food additives were a very bad thing for kids and hyperactivity. 1978 study published in the journal food and cosmetics toxicology. It found that hyperactive children given glucose. Tolerance tests had results that suggested reactive hypoglycemia, which is low blood sugar. So that’s where this whole idea came

Brie Tucker: Okay, wait. Can I just say that the fact that they put cosmetics, there is an actual journal about cosmetic toxicology, Very unnerving to me

JoAnn Crohn: there’s a journal for everything. There’s a

Brie Tucker: and they put food with the cosmetics like I don’t are people eating their lipstick out there Like I don’t know that just seems weird. Okay, go on go on. I digress

JoAnn Crohn: lipstick. That would be a good one, Brie. That would be a good one. So when you look at the actual research involved, and when you’re talking about actual research, it has to be valid and it looks at these three things to make it credible.

First of all, that there were known quantities of sugar in the diet. So like they knew how much sugar was being consumed. the study compared the effects of sugar with those of a placebo. and that’s a substance without any active ingredients. Something where people think they’re eating sugar, but they’re actually not eating sugar in this case.

And the children, parents, and researchers involved in the studies never knew which children were given which thing. So those are the three things when you’re looking at studies that, makes a study credible in this realm. And what they found out was incredibly, not surprising, but counter to the myth.

there’s actually an April, 2024 Washington post article published about this exact thing where they interview Mark Rollrage, who is a professor in developmental and behavioral pediatrics at the university of Oklahoma. And he says it’s. It’s still a strong belief, but it’s a total myth that sugar causes hyperactivity.

And Roelrich was actually, he was the one who conducted studies in the 90s that disproved the notion that sugar causes ADHD in children as well, just as a side note. but what they found is that neither sugar, Nor the artificial sweetener aspartame affected behavior or cognitive function among children whose parents perceive them as high energy sugar sensitive compared with those with normal behavior, even when the sugar intake exceeded typical dietary levels.

And that’s taken right from the Washington Post article. And another analysis in 1995 by the Journal of the American Medical Association said that sugar in the diet did not affect children’s behavior. And to top it off, this is something else I found, Brie, The CDC The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention also states that sugar doesn’t make kids hyper.

we have, like, a massive organization stating this as well, and yet the common belief is that sugar makes kids hyper. So when you look at hyperactivity in kids, there are actually, uh, Other reasons that kids could be hyper. and this was from the August, 1994 journal of abnormal child psychology. So look, I am quoting all my sources for y’all.

I’m like, I’m putting it in there. But what it showed is that parents who believe a child’s behavior is affected by sugar are more likely to perceive their children as hyperactive when they’ve been led to believe the child has just had sugar. so. It’s an interesting thing. It’s all about expectations and how we expect our kids to behave.

Brie Tucker: like when you have like when you believe something happens You will look for the evidence to support that And when it comes to, like, seeing whether or not your kid is hyper or not, like, that’s a very subjective. I mean, it seems like it would be objective, right?

It seems like it would be very easy to say hyperactivity versus non hyperactivity. Like, my kid is hyper right now. My kid is not hyper. And the truth of the matter is, unless you have a kid who is sleeping. For the non hyper, and a kid who was running around screaming like, Macaulay Culkin, and like, Home Alone. Ah!

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah.

Brie Tucker: Unless you have those two extremes, everything else in the middle is subjective. so, yeah. Yeah.

JoAnn Crohn: And a lot of people may say like, especially teachers, but JoAnn, the day after Halloween is chaos in the classroom. And I’m like, yeah, it is chaos in the classroom because kids have been taken out of their routine. They have probably stayed up really, really late at night. It is a very stimulating event and holiday.

And let’s face it. Most of the adults expect it. Expect the kids to be crazy. And so when you expect a behavior as an adult, you’re more likely to let those behaviors go. So like as a teacher in my classroom, I thought Halloween was just a loss. Like after the day after Halloween, I was like, okay, this is just a loss.

We’re just going to plan fun activities. And I planned fun activities because I didn’t expect the kids to be able to concentrate. I wish I could go back and be like, okay, you, you had a lot of sugar last night. You probably didn’t get much sleep as you’re used to last night. Cool. We’re going to try some things, but you know, it’s not the sugar that is making you feel hyper right now. It’s actually like your lack of sleep and things. So let’s be really

Brie Tucker: I was gonna ask you, I was gonna ask you, like, so are you saying you would go back and you would’ve changed what you did, or you still would’ve done the same thing, which it sounds like you still would’ve done the same thing, but you

JoAnn Crohn: I would have done the same

Brie Tucker: mindset as to why you were doing it.

JoAnn Crohn: Exactly. I would have had a different mindset because yeah, they are crazy cause they’re out of routine, but it’s not the sugar. It is the probably lack of sleep and just as something that was really stimulating for them last night. And they’re super tired and worn out and just

Brie Tucker: yeah, another thing to keep in mind with that, that kind of feeds into that bias and this, I, I hope everybody’s gonna be like, oh yeah, that’s totally true. Like, when, chances are good that we don’t give our kids a ton, a ton of sugar. and that could be for a lot of different reasons. What? Right?

Like, okay, I don’t let my kid eat an entire carton of Oreos. And why? Really? Because, not necessarily because of the sugar, because I know that after they eat that entire carton of Oreos, they’re gonna have a stomachache. Because of first of all, all the food they ate that was too much too. It, it probably isn’t full of, of like, you know, ingredients that they have on a regular basis. So their tummy’s like, what the heck is this? And three, like. I don’t know what my three was. I lost my train of thought. But my point is, is like like you get, you probably don’t have a lot it’s something that is limited how often they get it. So I don’t know about you, but when I get something that I really love, like, my macaroons from Decadent Macaroon, shout out to Decadent Macaroon and Gilbert. I love you guys. You are just the best thing in the whole wide world.

JoAnn Crohn: Send Brie all the macarons.

Brie Tucker: me all the macaroons. So, like, when I get to go get a macaroon, I get excited, like jump up and down. I get a little giddy and like, I get a little pep in my step. I’m like, good to go. So do I seem more active?

yes, but it has nothing to do with the sugar. It’s because I’m excited that I’m getting something that I really like. So that’s another thing to kind of keep in mind with this whole bias confirmation, seeing kids get after eating sugar. There could be a piece of it. There likely is a piece of it that they’re just excited that they’re getting to have this. Whatever item it is that has sugar in

JoAnn Crohn: Exactly. I dance when I get something sweet. Like if something tastes really good, I think

Brie Tucker: Your salt and straw.

JoAnn Crohn: so good. I’m dancing. Yeah. I would dance it like, it happens like that. Now, just because sugar doesn’t cause hyperness, it doesn’t mean that we’re suggesting you eat sugar with wild abandon. Like there are other downfalls to sugar,

Brie Tucker: get tummy aches probably

JoAnn Crohn: they’re empty. They’re also. Empty calories. There’s not much nutrition in it. , it’s a way like, like your body’s not getting what it needs out of it. So there’s not, it’s not a case to eat sugar, but just to show you that sugar does not cause hyperactivity.

So myth broken. Busted as they used to say on myth busters, we like stamp the screen myth busted. Let’s go on to our next myth about, children not being ready for bed and being not tired if they’re hyperactive. And we’re going to get into it right after this. So, we busted that sugar makes kids hyper. Myth number two. If kids are hyper, they’re not ready to go to sleep yet. I have seen this so much and it is such a myth.

Brie Tucker: Right, like it’s interesting because what you see is that your kid is like crazy full of energy. So that means that they must have a ton of energy, right?

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah. Yeah.

Brie Tucker: But no, that, that’s not really it. So when I was doing some research on why does this actually happen? Because I, I always looked at it as it was like, it’s a slapstick thing.

Like you’re just so tired. You’re almost delusional. But there actually is a physiological reason for this. What am I research? What I found was that when somebody doesn’t get enough rest, their body responds by making more cortisol. And adrenaline so that they can stay awake. So it’s like your body’s way of being like, all right, let’s tap into the reserves so that you can stay awake. And as a result, you tend to have more energy.

JoAnn Crohn: Yes.

Brie Tucker: that more often in children than in adults because kids don’t want to miss out on life. Life is exciting and fun.

JoAnn Crohn: Well, we see it

Brie Tucker: give me a nap time. Give me extra sleep. I

JoAnn Crohn: sometimes. Sometimes adults are like that. I would have to say my husband is directly opposite of that. He will tell me that the reason he doesn’t go to bed until 1 or 2 a. m. in the morning, he’s like, I’m not tired. I’m like, I could tell you why you’re not tired. You’re so overtired that your body is pumping cortisol and adrenaline through you. I don’t tell him that that would be like total shutdown on his part.

Brie Tucker: that’s, that’s not going to be the best conversation, but, my point is that it happens way less to adults than to children because adults are often more open to the idea of sleeping.

JoAnn Crohn: More some adults. Yes.

Brie Tucker: Yes. Adults are often more open to sleeping than, than a child. Like if you were to like randomly pull a hundred kids under the age of 10 and a hundred, People, like, adults, I don’t know, say between the ages of 30 and 50, we would all be like, give me that nap now. I, wait, I can get a nap

JoAnn Crohn: to naps. Sleeping is my happy time. I love to sleep

Brie Tucker: I love sleeping in. That’s

JoAnn Crohn: I feel like I am so, I cannot sleep in, I cannot sleep in. That is one thing I cannot do. I love going to sleep and like being like so tired at the end of the day and just pulling my fuzzy blankets over me and like just falling asleep. And then when the sun comes up immediately, my brain goes like, okay, you’re not doing enough. JoAnn. Look at, look at this beautiful sun time out time. You need to get outside. You need to take

Brie Tucker: you know what, you know what could help with

JoAnn Crohn: these thoughts.

Brie Tucker: Blackout curtains. I gotta tell ya, like, I don’t, I can’t, the hard, mm mm. you and I sleep in completely different manners. I, one thing I learned those last times, I gotta bring my sleep mask. Like, I like it to be completely black. I can’t stand any light.

Whatsoever. So even the littlest light wakes me up. so yeah. So I am definitely a. Lights out and it helps for sure. But so going back to this myth, I’m kind of curious how many people have, fallen under this because I feel like this one isn’t, it’s a myth, but I feel like there are, it’s a little bit more well known that it’s a myth than the sugar one for sure.

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah.

Brie Tucker: some people do know that like kids do get hyper when they’re tired And so do adults, like people in general. I should stop, I should stop like arguing about kids because it’s, it’s everybody in general, like you said about your body, like producing the cortisol and the adrenaline, but it does make it so that it’s like a walking contradiction. Like kids get. Weirdly overexcited and it seemed to have so much energy. And if you tell them, Oh, are you sleepy? They’ll be like, Oh, heck no. I’m not sleepy.

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, no, they won’t, they won’t say they’re sleepy at all. They’ll be bouncing off the walls. Like I see it happen. They become erratic. they like just become squirrely. Like my nephew actually Tuesday, Tuesday, he was jumping from chair to chair in our downstairs basement, like cheer, like leapfrogging across the room.

And then he would go and he would bonk my head, like Josh on the head. And so Josh would turn around. He’s like, ha ha don’t get me. And then. Then he stood up on top of the chair and showed us how he could fart on command.

Brie Tucker: Oh, wow.

JoAnn Crohn: that’s when we saw that skill happen, but he was so tired. He was so tired.

Like his body was being pumped full of adrenaline and you wouldn’t know. That he was tired looking at him. You’re just like, wow, that child has a lot of energy. and it’s not your first instinct to be like, and it’s bedtime.

Brie Tucker: Right. I mean, cause cause I, I will say, right, like adult or child, when someone gets to that point of sleepiness, that their body is producing These extra hormones to keep them raring and going. You cannot just slam on the brakes and be like, okay, bedtime. And they go, sounds great. Right? it doesn’t, it doesn’t work that way.

So you have to. Yeah, so, you gotta be a little sneaky when they get to this point, but like, what we’re trying to just point out is that first of all, do not think, ugh, we can’t do bedtime, he’s, he’s way too hyper, like, I’ve gotta, you know, I’ve gotta wear him out. Um, no, no, uh,

JoAnn Crohn: no, you don’t wear them out. Just take them into it. Like the way that I saw, I took the situation, because we had like a family situation going on. And so like, I took control of getting him to bed. and I, I was like, let’s go read some stories. Like I had to get him in an activity that would calm him down because there’s no going from like full speed, Jumping from chair to chair to be like, and fall asleep. you can’t do

Brie Tucker: bedtime.

JoAnn Crohn: You can’t do it. And so like we went and we read two stories and it was about 20 minutes and he was calmer than he was more ready to consider bedtime then, even though he was still like, Nope, still not tired. I’m like, well, cool.

Oh, look, your mommy’s back. She could lay down with you. And I was like, thank you for not, for not for making my whole, time with toddlers full time. Thank you. I’m done.

Brie Tucker: You, you lended your hand. You stepped in to help out. yeah, like, so, so the whole point is that you need to create a calming environment to help them

JoAnn Crohn: Calm

Brie Tucker: their body turn off the production of these hormones so that they can rest and get to that point. That’s the whole point of a sleep routine, actually, which is typically suggested like, working in like the zero to five area, we always would say bath, book, and bed.

Like if you could do the three Bs, that’s, that’s normally a really short routine. It’s really simple. Most people can adhere to it. I mean, not everybody can, and I’m saying most because 100%, like you’ve heard us say over and over again on. On this podcast, every family, every situation slightly different. There’s no perfect way to do it,

JoAnn Crohn: No perfect way to do

Brie Tucker: but that helps.

JoAnn Crohn: our podcast, Facebook group says that her daughter becomes erratic. She gets wild and then her attitude kicks in and she gets loud. Yeah. Yeah. Bedtime is a, and we are going to get into the next myth all about how kids need to be hyper else they don’t have ADHD right after this,

so we’ve covered two myths so far about kids and being hyper. The first myth, busted, that sugar makes kids hyper. The second myth, busted, if kids are hyper, they’re not ready to go to sleep yet. Brie, this is your favorite myth coming up. Introduce our third myth.

Brie Tucker: this is a favorite myth because I believed it all the way up until like, probably about a few months ago. So myth number three is that if your kid isn’t hyper, then they don’t have ADHD.

JoAnn Crohn: Mm hmm.

Brie Tucker: They, they can’t have ADHD because ADHD, the H is hyperactivity. So if my kid isn’t running around, then they must not have it. and I think that that’s because it’s true that a lot of the common traits of ADHD are being unable to sit still,

JoAnn Crohn: hmm.

Brie Tucker: in calm or quiet surroundings, constantly fidgeting. Like, Oh, I don’t know if you know anybody that, you know, likes to play with their pen all the time, being unable to concentrate on tasks, excessive physical movement. all those items are common ADHD traits, but the tricky part of it is, first of all, there’s different types of ADHD and there’s different types of, and you can also have AD, do they still have ADD as an,

JoAnn Crohn: they don’t actually, they changed it to all be ADHD and have the separate types. Yeah. But that was a co, that was a thing that was in the past, which led to people thinking that you can’t have ADHD if you’re not hyperactive because it was

Brie Tucker: And maybe, and maybe that’s why, because I’m in that age group that, like, we grew up of the age of ADD versus ADHD. But the, the big thing I wanted to articulate, and this is why I was under the misconception until recently, it’s my daughter. So, and I, and I did want to share a little bit. So I’m going to like share about the difference on that.

And then I wanted to share a little story about it and how you actually helped me get to the point where my daughter did get diagnosed with ADHD at 15 years old. So the point is, first of all, that often girls are missed when being diagnosed with ADHD because they don’t fit the visual version of hyperactivity.

JoAnn Crohn: Me. Yes. I have it. Yeah. And I, I didn’t even know because my sister does fit the version, and she was diagnosed with ADHD and I was, yeah. It didn’t even come on my radar until later.

Brie Tucker: Right. And so with girls, it can look totally different. Now, here’s the funny part. My daughter, when she was little, she wouldn’t even sit still to eat dinner. There are so many nights where I had to let her stand next to her chair and jump up and down while she was eating dinner. And, we put her in dance when she was three years old because she had so much energy and she needed to burn it off, before school.

I noticed that she did much better if I got her to the playground in the morning so that she could run around and play, then she would have a better day at school. There’d be less conversation from the teacher about how she was in class, talking up and moving around a lot. So you would think that I was like, when she was little had ADHD and I did have concerns and I would bring it up to the teachers because I felt like teachers knew a lot more about it than I did.

And I would also, I think I might’ve brought it up to her pediatrician once or twice. didn’t have like, she wasn’t having any trouble at school. She wasn’t having any trouble at home. So they’re like. Even if she does have it, it’s so minor, like what’s the point of doing anything about it? Because she’s able to do everything just fine.

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah.

Brie Tucker: Well, then middle school hit, right? And then the very beginning of high school, and she was so struggling having all this like very impulsive behaviors. not really thinking through consequences, having, difficulties with friendships. And then, also during that whole course of several years. Like math skills and anything that required a long, lengthy attention, just pretty much tanked.

Like there was no ability to have any of that. And I remember us talking just this past summer, I was talking to you about all the struggles I was having with my daughter. And I’m like, I just don’t, I’m like, I’m trying to help her. Like we’re trying to do therapy. We’re trying all these things. And I think she’s getting like a little bit better, but not great. I’m noticing that now she’s like withdrawing and You said to me, you’re like, Hey, have, have you looked into like what it looks like in girls?

JoAnn Crohn: Mm hmm.

Brie Tucker: And I, right. and I fought you on it so much. Cause I was like, no, no, no, no. That’s not it. That’s not it. and then you were all like, Hey, don’t you have like that doctor’s appointment in a couple of weeks for her?

Like, well check it. I’m like, yeah, she goes, have you thought about just having to do a screening or whatever? I don’t know. I don’t, she, I don’t think so. Opal blood. and then when we were there, the doctor was saying, your affect seems flat. You know, what’s going on? She’s talking to my daughter and, and I just, so I pipe in and I’m like, you know, can we get a screening for ADHD?

JoAnn Crohn: hmm.

Brie Tucker: And her dad was there at the visit and he’s not typically at them. and the, and my, my ex goes, Well, she doesn’t have ADHD. Why would you ask her something like that? And the doctor looks at him and goes, hold on a minute. This actually makes a lot of sense.

JoAnn Crohn: Mm hmm.

Brie Tucker: And she starts talking about how it presents differently in girls.

And how she’s like, you know, yeah, let’s do, let’s do a screening. So like we did the 150 question screening like a

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, that’s a big one.

Brie Tucker: God. Yeah. It was huge. We sit down. It was like her dad, her and I, because again, being divorced, she was like, you know, we could see different behaviors at different houses. It depends on how you, it was, it’s, it’s objective or not objective. Subjective. Sorry. Yes.

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah, it’s all good.

Brie Tucker: Yeah. How did you see it? And we come back, we fill out the screening and we didn’t agree on all the answers, but like when it came to where her dad and I disagreed, obviously my My daughter was the one that was like, I think I’m more like this. So those were the answers. Come back and the doctor’s like, yep, she’s got ADHD inattentive. And I’m like, okay,

JoAnn Crohn: Yeah. Yeah. I’m glad you guys got a diagnosis with it because I mean, I, I saw it in her. Just because I know your daughter and I’ve known her for a very long time. And just based on everything that’s happened throughout the years, it totally made sense in the trajectory of it. , but I mean, I was an inattentive ADHD year.

I had, I didn’t like I was, I had coping skills in place for it. And I think that’s where a lot of women get stuck because we are such People pleasers were raised to like, make everybody happy and not create a fuss that we develop like strategies to cope with it. While all the while we’re beating ourselves up inside and being like, why is this so hard for me? There must be something wrong with me that this is so hard.

Brie Tucker: I’m so much, I’m so big. I’m so loud. Why am I so much of that?

JoAnn Crohn: Or like I was, I mean, I was a gifted and talented student. He’s just sent me this real yesterday.

Brie Tucker: Yes.

JoAnn Crohn: And I sent it to my friend Bridget, who like, we all went to the same high school. It was a gifted high school. And it said something like, Hey, if you’re in the gifted and talented education program in the nineties, how’s your over like over functioning ADHD procrastination and perfectionism

Brie Tucker: And high

JoAnn Crohn: and your high functioning anxiety. And if you’re also the oldest daughter, I was like, Oh, I feel seen because like ADHD, you don’t have to be hyper. It’s just like this inability to pay attention. And the way I. Coped with it is specifically when I was in class and in lecture style classes, like I would zone out for like 10 minutes at a time and it would be so frustrating on me because I would go into a class.

I’d be like class today. I am going to pay attention to this class and I sit there and I look at the teacher and I’m paying attention and I’m making notes and then something else would like catch my attention and I would go off this big loop and this like imaginary thing and then thinking of something else and something else and something else and then I’m like, crap, I have no idea what he just said, and I can’t follow the rest of the discussion now.

So, uh, I mean it and the way I coped with that is like I would read the textbook at home where I could take my own pace. With it. I would ask friends, but even in that class, I did horribly in that one class where the teacher based much of the class content on lecture. when I took that AP, I got a two, a two on the AP out of five. when I took the European history AP, the one where, I had to like take book notes and I had to do notes off the book notes, I got a three on that one, which was at least passing, but it definitely wasn’t my forte. Uh, all because I can’t pay attention to things I’m not interested in.

Brie Tucker: Right. And I, I, I have the same issue. Like, I’ve been waiting to go to the doctor and like, yeah, I, I need to get my, my ducks in a row. Procrastination. That’s not a sign of ADHD at all. Uh, anyway. but yeah,

JoAnn Crohn: But sometimes you need that. You need the procrastination and ADHD. There is a reason I cannot work on things unless I have very defined, like, I’m gonna get this done. This in this done during this time block, if I just leave it as an open time block, like I have this entire week on a big project that we’ve been working on, I’ve just put like, I’ve blocked out like three hours of time here, three hours of time here, three hours of time here all week long.

And I did not put those specific things I was doing and guess who has not worked on the project at all. Me, because I have found more quote unquote important things to concentrate on during that time that I have not done.

Brie Tucker: Well, but I think part of that too, is like us just putting off the crap we don’t want to do for whatever the reason is.

JoAnn Crohn: But I have strategies to do it. Like I know it’s ADHD. I know it is. And like, I didn’t want to write those books. Like, I mean, I don’t want to say that. I didn’t want to sit down. I didn’t want to sit down and write at a time. And so I had parameters. I’m like, I’m going to put my timer on for 20 minutes and I’m just going to write for 20 minutes. Because that’s how long I can stay focused. And I just, I wrote a book 20 minutes at a time, and so it’s, it’s interesting the coping strategies, that’s like a whole other episode. Coping strategies women have when they have undiagnosed ADHD.

Brie Tucker: Right. Yeah. 100%. So a couple more things that I found that I wanted to share. and I didn’t, I didn’t cite my resource in the last one, but this one’s mainly taken from an article from the child mind Institute. And we have links in the show notes to all the articles that we were using for this, for information.

But girls with ADHD often have a type called ADHD and attentive. and that means that they have a hard time paying attention. Just like JoAnn was talking about staying organized. And oh, another thing Joy was talking about organizing their time, but they are not hyper. They don’t fit into the picture that most people have for ADHD, which is boy who can’t sit still and is bouncing off the walls or the furniture. Right. And a lot of times, girls can get mislabeled as spacey.

JoAnn Crohn: Yes.

Brie Tucker: or unmotivated. So real quickly, I wanted to run over just what the three types of ADHD are. I have like, I have a little image in front of me to read through real quick. So the first one that we’re talking about is inattentive ADHD.

That one’s inattentive, procrastination, hesitation, and forgetfulness. Then you have predominantly hyperactive, impulsive ADHD, which is problems paying attention, excessive activity, difficulty controlling impulsive behavior. Right? And then you have the combined type of ADHD, which is your classic, well, like co classic.

It’s your classic ADHD that we all have in our heads. The kid that’s running around, inattentive, can’t stop interrupting, impulsive, cannot follow directions, cannot sit still. So those are your, three types of ADHD. So just because your kiddo isn’t running around bouncing off the walls, And is not hyperactive.

That doesn’t mean that they couldn’t be on, on the spectrum. So, so what can you do? Go to your pediatrician. Have them do a screening or a test. Even if they tell you no, they don’t think your kid needs it. If you have a question in your mind, Who does it hurt

JoAnn Crohn: Exactly.

Brie Tucker: do it? Like that, I think that was my hesitation. Was that like, I knew that my ex would say absolutely not. I knew that my daughter didn’t want to have anything wrong with her. So I knew she would probably be against it. But I have to tell you, and you would agree, right? Like, since we had that doctor’s appointment, and since we have been working on Anxiety and, and it’s in the ADHD type thing. Her trajectory has completely changed. She is much happier,

JoAnn Crohn: Mm-Hmm.

Brie Tucker: a much more, open, active. Child. She’s getting, she was failing math last year. This year, she has all A’s and we’re coming into finals next week. Yeah.

JoAnn Crohn: amazing. Yeah.

Brie Tucker: Yeah. So, I mean, like it’s, it has completely changed the world with us and all because you mentioned it. Yeah.

JoAnn Crohn: Ah, well, thank you

Brie Tucker: yes, so I just so like if there is any part of you that’s like maybe with my kid But you know, I mentioned to the doctor and they said that no they don’t think it’s so what so what I still want the Screening let’s just do it.

JoAnn Crohn: let’s just do it. Let’s see. Let’s see where they fall. Exactly. Exactly

Brie Tucker: tell us like yeah, like we’d love to get feedback Like what do you guys think about this episode? How many of these myths are you believing or did you believe before you listened?

JoAnn Crohn: how did we help bust them for you and until next time remember the best mom’s a happy mom, take care of you. We’ll talk to you later.

Brie Tucker: Thanks for stopping by.

Brie Tucker

COO/ Podcast Producer at No Guilt Mom
Brie Tucker has over 20 years of experience coaching parents with a background in early childhood and special needs. She holds a B.S. in Psychology from the University of Central Missouri and is certified in Positive Discipline as well as a Happiest Baby Educator.

She’s a divorced mom to two teenagers.

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