Why You’re the Only One Who Notices What Needs Doing (and How to Fix It) with Sam Kelly

If you’ve ever felt the weight of the mental load and wondered why you’re the only one who notices what needs to be done around the house, this episode is for you.

Sam Kelly, author of Notice and Do, joins me to talk about the moment she realized she was teaching her kids to rely on her for all the noticing, just like her husband had. We talk about the rage that comes with carrying the mental load, why a chore system only gets you half of the way there, and how to hand over ownership without hovering.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why noticing is a teachable skill, just like brushing your teeth or tying your shoes
• How to turn grief and rage about the mental load into fuel for change
• What the Big Three and learning ladders are, and how they give kids real ownership
• Why a chore chart relies on you to do all the noticing and delegating, and what to do instead
• How pre-existing motivators work for strong-willed and ADHD kids, and why the pushback is temporary

Resources mentioned in this episode:

• Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load by Sam Kelly
• Sam Kelly’s website
• Sam Kelly on Instagram (@samkelly_world)
• Happy Home Ladder
• No Guilt Mom Inner Circle
• The Best Mom is a Happy Mom by JoAnn Crohn
• No Guilt Mom podcast page

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